The After Party Party Newsletter Issue #1

Eagle Eye
Aug 10, 2025
2 min read

the after party party Manifesto

(Full Version: Read ‘Em and Weep)

Politics aren’t real. The system is broken, the rules are made up, and the only real currency is cash—or crippling apathy. When they make you choose between a dumbo and an ass, it’s time for The After Party Party (TAPP).

We are the party you’ve always wanted but were too exhausted to attend. The one that starts after promises deflate and pundits nap. If you wake up in your political party and don’t recognize a thing—congratulations. You just stumbled into ours.

The first rule of The After Party Party is you tell everyone about The After Party Party.
The second rule? Repeat that.
The third rule? Leave your bullshit at the door.

What happens at The After Party Party stays there—unless it’s meme-worthy.

We take worthless crypto, wild conspiracy theories, and emotional baggage. We do the political hokey pokey, turn ourselves around, and abolish left and right—they’re broken anyway.

Let’s laugh at the machine until it grinds to dust—preferably to disco music.

Core Beliefs (Quick Hit Version)

Politics aren’t real. Go to The After Party Party instead.
Dumbo vs. Ass? Nah. Choose sequins and satire.
Rule #1 & #2: Tell everyone about The After Party Party.
Rule #3: Leave your bullshit at the door.
What happens here stays… unless it's fire meme fuel.
We take worthless crypto and conspiracy theories.
We do hokey-pokey with reality—because sideways is the new straight.

THE AFTER PARTY PARTY NEWSLETTER ISSUE #1

Political Happenings (That Actually Matter)

Texas Democrats flee to block redistricting

Lawmakers fled Texas to stop GOP’s gerrymander, triggering national blowback, arrests, and political theater.

404: Democracy crumbling → Project 2025 rises

The Heritage Foundation’s plan to consolidate executive control, purge civil service, and reshape governance. Bleak and barbaric.

Trump–Putin summit announced for Alaska

On August 15, the two will meet sans Ukraine’s input. Autocrats in vacation gear.

Bring Your Friends (The More the Merrier… or Messier)

Know someone who laughed at politics until it hurt? Hit “Forward.” to sign up for The After Party Party's Newsletter. Let’s turn this into a movement of the weird, the woke, and the wondrously fed-up.

FORWARD